I hate asking for favors.
I never liked being indebted to anyone. Asking for help always felt as though I failed. That’s why I don’t reach out for support. I never asked for money, I never asked for help with personal projects, I never asked for advice… I avoided asking for anything as much as I possibly could.
I realized several years later, however, I never managed to avoid debt. In fact, I’ve always been indebted to someone. Just by being there as a friend, they are helping you and, thus, you are effectively indebted to them. That is something I failed to realize until it was almost too late.
Every time someone would reach out and chat with me, to ask me how my day was or ask what I was doing, I took it for granted. Sometimes, there would be days before I would respond to someone and the kindness they showed me. Every time I neglected to extend even the most basic of courtesy back to someone, I collected more debt. I never realized just how much debt I incurred until I nearly reached social bankruptcy.
I’m so ashamed every time I think about how I’ve let people down. There’ve been times when I would be extremely uncommunicative, disrespectful of people’s times, or forget to keep my friends updated. These are the debts I get every time I make these mistakes.
When debt is overdue, sharks are sent to collect them. What about social debt? What happens when someone owes a significant amount to one person? The answer is obvious — you either make an effort to pay it back or suffer the consequence. Either communicate better, or lose a valuable friend.